This advice on how to pick up girls goes against everything 'they' tell you... and gets better results.
Moving Away From How To Pick Up Girls
In this article we’re gonna chop up a few of the Sacred Cows of advice on how to pick up girls and make us some hamburger.
Specifically, we’ll look at how a number of the core beliefs and attitudes promoted within the ‘Seduction Community’ are, in fact, misperceptions that will most likely negatively affect a guy’s chances of successfully dating lots and lots of really hot girls while also being able to find, meet, get and keep a high value woman of exceptional beauty and accomplishment.
We’ll also discuss any number of alternatives that the guys here at DateMasters have found that work much better when it comes to having positive, smooth, and enjoyable interactions with the best women in the world – the Total Tens.
But we’ll give the Pick Up Artists and their Seduction Community it’s due – they encouraged guys to go out and meet more women. Yes, they sought to gird guys in the armor of memorized routines, crazy antics, and such to supposedly make it easier, but in the end it all came down to motivating guys to get themselves face to face with more women. Plain and simple. And that’s good.
But that’s pretty much all the good they’ve done and it’s outweighed by all the bad. And there’s a lot of bad.
For example, pushing guys to continue interactions with girls that obviously weren’t interested in them (they call it ‘ploughing’). That is, was, and always will be a mistake that goes against their own interests. Or advocating a ‘group’ approach to meeting women (the infamous Wingman or Posse) over the individual and independent man. Then there’s the whole ‘Us vs. Them’ ‘Predator / Prey’ ‘Target-Obstacle’ misogynistic mentality that is rife throughout the writings and teachings of pretty much all the advice for how to pick up girls. For a lot of guys who already had serious issues when it came to relating with women, this dark attitude has potentially made it virtually impossible for them to ever have anything even remotely called a ‘relationship’ much less a warm and happy, uplifting and nurturing love with a high-value women of exceptional beauty and accomplishment.
How to Pick Up Girls Misperception #1
Being the Alpha Male
Here’s where the entire Seduction Community started off on the wrong foot and, for all of you who know anything about geography, when you set off on a journey by going in the wrong direction you shouldn’t be all that surprised when you never reach your destination. The Pickup Artists posited that by acting like Alpha Males (Leader of Men, Protector of Loved Ones, blah-blah) they could get women to like them. They actually got it totally backwards.
High-Quality Women don’t particularly like Alpha Males, but rather the men High-Quality Women actually like they then perceive as Alpha Males. Once a girl truly likes a guy, she tends to do some kind of powerful magic inside her own head that transforms her perceptions so that pretty much everything her Handsome Prince does she actually sees as truly awesome. It’s not that he actually is all that amazing (although that certainly helps), but rather she believes him to be. So, rather than putting on all kinds of airs and attitude, guys would be a lot better off simply looking for and only dating girls that actually and genuinely like them from the very beginning and then remembering to keep things light, playful and fun for her so she can continue building her own image of him as a truly Alpha Guy. And yes, it surely helps a whole lot if, from that point on, he avoids doing dumb things that knock himself off the pedestal that she’s erecting for him. Letting her hold on to her idea that he’s a great guy, even if it’s true only inside her head, is probably the best gift any man can give his Lady.
How to Pick Up Girls Misperception #2:
Using Memorized Routines
It’s funny how once the Pickup Artists started off in the wrong direction, they fairly blazed a path that led them straight to Hell. Most of the time that trailblazing was the direct result of their looking at the issues and asking the wrong questions.
Memorized Routines came about along the way as their answer to the question ‘But what do I say to her to make her like me?’ What they really should have been asking is ‘When I actually find a girl who likes the way I look and seems comfortable with my personality (either naturally extroverted or naturally introverted) what do I say to her to make it easy for her to continue building positive feelings for me until she is completely in love with me?’ The answer to that question (the right one) is ‘Just about anything that’s playful, light, funny, positive, and upbeat. As long as she’s laughing and having a good time you’re doing it right.’
Think back to a time when you met someone new for the very first time and the two of you just naturally kind of ‘clicked’ – it was as if the whole conversation just sort of magically spun itself out of whole cloth fully formed. There were no awkward pauses, you were practically finishing each others sentences, new topics came up naturally while old conversation threads were left open for additional discussion later on. Time flew by and throughout the entire time you both were laughing and having a wonderful time.
THAT is exactly how things go when you meet a Total Ten and the two of you naturally ‘click.’
The guys at DateMasters meet a lot of women every day. Lots of women. Really LOTS. Not with the intention of persuading her or manipulating her to like us. Never. Rather, our guys are simply going out and meeting as many women as they possibly can, as quickly as they can, with an eye towards identifying the ones that genuinely and enthusiastically like us from the very initiation of the interaction. We’re looking for the ones that are into us from the get go and we let go of the ones that aren’t.
We know from all our countless interactions with endless numbers of women that when we finally find a hot one with whom we ‘click’ that our conversation will naturally flow, that we’ll be amazingly funny, witty, charming, upbeat, and playful, because that’s how things go when two people meet for the very first time and there is a powerful chemistry put in motion. Hence we don’t really bother with any Memorized Routines when learning how to pick up girls.
Yes, Memorized Routines are probably a necessity for guys who are seeking to force themselves upon women who have no real interest in them – but what would ever make a guy want to be with a girl like that to begin with? Is his self-esteem so low, his need for companionship/sex/human interaction so desperate that he would willingly settle for an extra-average girl? That’s pretty pathetic, don’t you think.
Better for guys to go out everyday with the intention of meeting and talking to lots of new women, always keeping an eye out for those Total Tens that almost immediately see him as the answer to all their romantic dreams.
Next we’ll continue our investigation of misperceptions of how to pick up girls by looking at the fallacy of ‘Being a Natural’ and the trap that is ‘Game’ and show you how many of the ideas, attitudes, presuppositions, and beliefs put forward by the Pick Up Artist / Seduction Community not only are short-sighted and truly ineffective when it comes to successfully interacting with High Value Women of Exceptional Beauty and Accomplishment (what we here at Datemasters like to call The Total 10s) but also detrimental to the very thought-processes of guys who are seeking long-term happiness and success with any females.
Now let’s discuss two more rotting beams holding up the ramshackle hovel that calls itself Pickup: becoming a ‘Natural’ and the entire concept of ‘Game.’
How to Pick Up Girls Misperception #3:
Becoming a ‘Natural’
The very idea of ‘Learning Natural Game’ when guys try to learn how to pick up women is the other side of an insidious false dichotomy set up by the marketing wizards within the Seduction Community to polarize its members into warring factions (Memorized Routines Guys vs. Naturals). As long as guys are arguing over which school is better, neither side looks closely at the entire debate and realizes that neither method serves guys well in the long run and that the debate itself only serves as a distraction from what really works with women. The whole thing is basically a scam. We’ve already discussed the flaws with memorized routines. Now lets have at it with the ‘Naturals.’
For our purposes, let’s define the ‘Natural’ as a guy who, without any specific study, training, or tutoring, is exceedingly successful with lots of High-Value Women of Exceptional Beauty and Accomplishment. Perhaps they were blessed with great looks, great personalities, great senses of humor, whatever. These are the guys who many women seem to flock to – even though they are not movie stars, professional athletes or musicians, or captains of industry. They’re simply regular guys, and yet women just seem to like them for who they are. These guys seemingly know exactly how to handle women in such a way that they always seem to have their pick of the best ones.
Estimates vary but we’ll assume, for the sake of argument, that these ‘God’s Gift to Women’ make up between 2~5% of the total male population. Obviously, not many guys are lucky enough to be a ‘Natural’ and that’s exactly the point: If you’re not a Natural, then anything you do to try to actually be a ‘Natural’ is, by it’s very definition, synthetic, or unnatural. It’s similar to that whole ‘authentic’ meme floating around in the media recently. There are any number of politicians, newscasters, and celebrities on the scene these days who are extolling the value of ‘authenticity’ and profess how they always ‘try to be authentic’ all the while seemingly oblivious to how oxymoronic they are being. Someone really needs to sit them down and say ‘Hey, doofus! If you have to try then you’re not authentic. Get your head out from up between your legs and face the light. ’ It’s the same with the PUAs who want to be ‘Natural.’ Simply: If, when you first came to pickup, you weren’t already madly successful with lots and lots of Total 10s then you’re NOT a Natural as far as the PUA / Seduction Community defines the word. You’re a …. How about we call you a ‘Synthetic, does that work? Maybe not. We could call you an ‘Un-Natural.’ Is that better? Probably not. Whatever.
Rather than chase after the whole ‘Natural’ chimera, guys would be better served by looking more closely at what it represents. Some girls will like the way you look from the moment they see you. Many won’t. Some girls will simply adore your personality right out of the gate. Many won’t. Some girls will totally groove on your sense of humor. Many won’t. The best you can do is always look your best, understand how to best represent your personality, and hone your sense of humor to match that of the types of women you hope to attract into your life. Is that ‘Natural?’ No, it isn’t. But you weren’t born one, so it’s no use wishing otherwise. Move forward and avoid the Community’s traps.
How to Pick Up Girls Misperception #4:
The Idea of ‘Game’
This is your life – it’s not a Game. As implied by the very word and also by the extreme nature of the lingo/geek speak/definitions and terms within the Seduction Community, the ‘Game’ is adversarial with a winner-loser mentality.
PUAs talk in terms of targets, obstacles, strategies, overcoming resistance, defenses, shields, destroyers, caveman, blocking, field, wingman, etc. All these words and everything they represent simply reinforces the entire Us vs. Them, Dating = War, Women = Enemy paradigm that exists within the highly misogynistic environment that calls itself the ‘Seduction Community.’ Look at the word seduction itself! It’s getting someone to do something that is against their own better interests. How messed up is that? That’s nothing less than a hypnotic induction that guys buy into – a presupposition that he is unworthy as an individual and must resort to tricks, tactics, and strategies in order to get what he wants from women; things that she wouldn’t normally want to do of her own free will. WTF?!
This isn’t a war, a battle, a fight.
Let go of all that darkness.
Look at it as a Dance.
Yes, similar to a Dance. When guys go out and look to meet as many girls as they possibly can, in as short amount of time as possible, they begin the process of searching for a suitable dance partner. Sure, whole lot of girls won’t want to dance, many can’t dance, some can only do the Watusi or the Monkey, and not a whole lot can elegantly Waltz – but there are girls out there who do and they’re desperately looking for their Prince to sweep them up and away.
When meeting all these new women, the DateMaster constantly keeps his eyes and ears open to the clear signals that women give a man when they pretty much instantly like him and want to continue interacting with him. He then happily continues the conversations with the ones that give him those signals, keeping things light and playful, and her laughing for the few minutes it takes for him to ask for her phone number. Conversely he politely discontinues the contact with all the many women who don’t give him positive signals, just as he would if the girl were to say she doesn’t know nor care to learn how to waltz. He ceases all efforts to persuade or manipulate her in order to ‘win’ a zero-sum ‘Game’ and instead merely moves on and continues his search for a suitable dance partner. (Note: Any guy reading this who thinks, ‘Hey, I don’t like dancing, I don’t even know how to dance!’ really needs to review the preceding paragraphs while repeating to himself ‘It’s only a metaphor. It’s only a metaphor.’ Okay?)
DateMasters know it’s all a numbers game: meet lots and LOTS of women, quickly identify the ones that like us from the jump, let go of all the others. Always look our best, keep it light and upbeat. Ask her for her name and when she’s laughing and having a good time ask her for her phone number.
It’s time for guys to open their eyes and see that the entire Pick Up Artist / Seduction Community has sold them nothing but lies on how to pick up girls, half-truths and encouraged them to waste their lives chasing Fool’s Gold.
Look at your time in the ‘Game’ – have you really ever met a High-Value Women of Exceptional Beauty and Accomplishment? (No, strippers, pinup models or porn actresses don’t count as High-Value, no matter how you want to parse the meaning of the words.)
Or have you only met average ones or worse – those extra-average girls who put on airs like they’re all that, but you really know are just ratty and nasty.
Is that what you really feel you deserve?
Isn’t it time for you to step up, man up, sack up, and say ‘I want the best for myself and my future children. I’m committing to finding, meeting, getting, and keeping, my Total 10 and I won’t settle for anything less!’
Do that.
Make the commitment to only settle for the very best.
You can be sure she has, too.
And she’s looking for you.
It’s time for guys to open their eyes and see that the entire Pick Up Artist / Seduction Community has sold them nothing but lies on how to pick up girls, half-truths and encouraged them to waste their lives chasing Fool’s Gold.
